Keeping my Head Above Water

Working full time as a litigation attorney and being a mom to a baby is hard y'all.  I am loving Clara so much and loving being her mom.  And I don't want to be a stay at home mom.  But I'm still finding my groove as far as managing everything goes.  I've been having to travel which has been rough in a number of ways and am super busy at work.  At times I feel like my brain is going to explode.  And my heart too because time spent away from the cutest of babies (Clara in case that's not obvious) often feels like time wasted.  I know I'm not the first person to struggle with this situation and I know that I have a number of options available to me.  I am going to make it work -- no question in my mind -- but like anything else that's important it's going to be hard work and cause some stress.  So this is all to say I'm pretty stressed out.  But life has never been better so there you have it.

Loving the Bouncy Chair

Oh, running?  No, I haven't been getting much exercise.  One groove-hitting at a time.  I can't get it all sorted out all at once.  That would surely throw me over the edge.

Motherhood -- weeks 0-7

The past 7 weeks have been a blur.  My days involve feeding Clara every couple of hours and trying to catch some sleep at night between feedings.  I seem unable to nap during the day and when I've tried, she has woken up and protested.  It's wonderful and exhausting all at the same time.  I don't really have the mental energy for much else though I have been out and about some.  

she sometimes smiles now if you smile at her!

I was cleared to run this past week and ran a few miles pain free.  It felt so wonderful!  However, my hamstrings were pretty sore from having not run in 6 months.  I guess hiking and the other stuff I've been doing don't use the same muscles. 

Really not much to report which is the report.  Caring for a newborn is all consuming yet there's not really much to say about it.  I go back to work next week which should be interesting.  I'm so grateful that Ted gets to take a few months off and spend some quality bonding time with our little girl. 

Birth Story -- A Race Report

Clara Shelly Coffman



Birth stories aren't supposed to be race reports, but because of my total ignorance of the fact that I no longer control things and my hubris, my birth story was a race.   A race to get home while on a work trip...

On Sunday February 24 I flew to Billings for a mediation.  Although I would be 37 weeks on Tuesday, it seemed totally reasonable to attend an out of town mediation on Monday.  I mean, there was no way I would be early.  In fact, I was quite confident I would go late and was researching whether I should ask to be induced at 41 weeks.  Because, you know, I get to decide these things.

I landed in Billings at 11:30 p.m. on Sunday night.  Walking to my rental car I felt a trickle in my pants.  "Did I seriously just pee myself?" I asked myself.  I'd heard of such things happening late in pregnancy.  Oh how embarassing.  I had been advised to super hydrate to avoid blood clots and I figured that was what I get for overhydrating. 

I checked into my hotel room and seemed to still be leaking.  This wasn't pee.  I panicked.  Should I drive home?  Bad idea -- it was the middle of the night and a snow storm.  I called to see if I could get an earlier flight home the next day.  Nope.  I reluctantly decided I should go to the Billings Clinic to get checked out.

At the Billings Clinic I tested positive for amniotic fluid but it didn't appear I was still leaking and an ultrasound showed plenty of fluid.  It also showed that little Clara Beara was breech.  The doctor said "C Section for you if she doesn't turn!"  Thanks lady. 

I did confirm that for $2000 I could get a private plane home with little notice.  With that knowledge in my back pocket I wearily went to mediation -- having not slept basically all night.  I leaked all day and knew I just needed to get home.  I did NOT want to give birth in Billings.  Alone.  I didn't really tell people at work, except my client, that I was in labor when the contractions started around lunchtime or call my doc because I didn't want anyone to make me stay in Billings.  I figured if things really seemed to be progressing I would go back to the Billings Clinic or maybe give birth in Salt Lake City where my layover was.  Both places have good hospitals.  In any event as of 4:00 a.m. I had lots of fluid and figured I had 24 hours to get home and safely deliver (based on my understanding of protocols when your membranes rupture).

I got my case settled :-)

My contractions were about 30 minutes apart and super easy all the way until I landed back in Kalispell at 11:30 p.m. Monday night.  I showered and went to bed, hoping things would stay low key until morning at which time I had a pre-scheduled doctor's appointment. 

Around 2:30 I woke up with a SERIOUS FOR REALS contraction.  Then they kept coming!  Ouch!  Realizing that this unfun labor would serve no purpose since I was likely having a C-Section I called the doc and headed to the hospital at 3:00 a.m.

Clara Shelly Coffman was delivered by C-Section at 5:34 a.m. on February 25.

The C-Section was actually sort of fun.  I planned an all natural suffer-through birth but enjoyed witnessing surgery.  I didn't mind the spinal block by the time I got it -- I was having back labor which offers no breaks at all unlike contractions which give you a few minutes respite. 

3.5 weeks post-partum and I'm feeling pretty good if tired.  I can walk a few miles and abdominal weakness seems to be my limitation -- doing too much makes my back hurt.  I lost 20 or so pounds the first week but am hanging onto another 10 or so pounds.  I am optimistic that by June 2015 when I turn 40 I can be in better shape than I was when I got pregnant in June 2013. 

She is beautiful and we are so in love with her.  It's true all the things parents say...

OK she's screaming time to go...

34 Weeks - Whitefish Whiteout

 

I did the "uphill" division of the Whitefish Whiteout -- ski mountaineering race -- a couple weeks ago.  Remarkably, I still made it up in 67 minutes, only 20 minutes slower than last year when I weighed 30 pounds less (I gained 10 between April and June while trying to get pregnant and was up 20 pounds as of a couple weeks ago...)  So, while my weight increased by 23% my time slowed by 42%.  I think.  Math is hard.  In any event I am not only giant-er I am not allowed to go as hard as I possibly can and am, well, really pregnant.  I did wear a spandex race suit, as you can see above, which was not only amazingly flattering but made me aerodynamic and therefore fast.  I actually won the womens' uphill division (though I was also the only woman).  Speaking of weight, I seem to be on track to gain a total of 30 pounds which is in the middle of the 25-35 recommended.  If you add in the extra 10 I appear to have gained in the few months preceding pregnancy I will have gained enough that I will probably not be one of those women who is in her pre-preggo jeans within a week of delivery...

In other news of greatness, Joanna came to visit last weekend.  We have been friends since we were 4 years old.  Although I was completely useless and did nothing but eat all their snacks, I was there for the birth of her first and she is my birthing inspiration.  She made it look pretty easy though I know it wasn't.  I hope to be like her and have a smooth sailing peaceful "natural" childbirth (to the extent that birth is really anything other than natural).  It was nice to catch up and hang out even if it was just a quick weekend.  We cross-country skied in Glacier National Park which was pleasant and a nice workout. 

I am otherwise just trying to gear up for the big big dance.